frillr

i have come to accept that i will never be the kind who will sit down and concentrate when she needs to, that i will always be distracted by inconsequential sites surfing the likes of kabuki brushes and dresses despite a pressing need to (have) finish(ed) an essay say, 96 hours ago.

so right now im starting to really sit down and work on the paper PROPERLY because i just want to get it off my chest, and like a virgin is running incessantly within my head and threatening to explode from within my lungs and listening to it IS NOT HELPING. why is it when i finally can sit down and concentrate, i feel like singing !

caresse sur l’ocean

the other night at mels, after our reunion dinner/steamboat, we watched les choristes. it couldve been the ninetyseventh time ive watched this movie but i swear everytime i am captivated and jean baptiste maunier never, NEVER fails to send chills down my spine. EVERYTIME, DAHT BAI. do yourself a favour, watch les choristes by hook or by crook, or just watch this,

im going to watch and rewatch the video. happy chinesenewyear !

above all, stay gold

our lives are mere flashes of light in an infinitely empty universe. in 12 years of education the most important lesson i have learned is that what we see as “normal” living is truly a travesty of our potential. in a society so governed by superficiality, appearances, and petty economics, dreams are more real than anything in the “real world.” refuse normalcy. beauty is everywhere, love is endless, and joy bleeds from our everyday existence. embrace it .. remember that every day contains a universe of potential; exhaust it. live and love so intensely that when death comes there is nothing left for him to take. wealth is love, music, sports, learning, family, and freedom. above all, stay gold.

- YOU ARE REMARKABLE

we all live in a yellow submarine

i cannot find my glasses. which makes perfect sense because if i can see things clearly i wouldnt need glasses. this is not the first time; the worst has got to be the flight from london to paris when they dropped onto the floor and i couldnt find them anywhere and i had to wait for the whole plane to evacuate before dropping to my knees to look under the seats. rather embarrassing. now ive my head reallyclose to the screen (i cant sleep yet cos hair is wet). zz i really cannot find themmmm. ive looked in all the bags, all the tables, the boudoir, toilets .. really everyfreakingwhere): i cant remember whether i wore them this morning before i left for ecp though. sometimes i think im really need to control-f my room;

EY THIS IS A BITCH, YO. I NEED MY GLASSES !):

redcliff

the boys didnt like redcliff, said it was technically unsound and that plot was awfully weak, not to mention its historical inaccuracy (that coming from chinesehighboys who read the hardcore chinese novels so im not going to doubt them) but i must say i Really Liked It ! like after every good flick, i needed time aplenty to ruminate after leaving the cinema, but even with the boys thrashing it beside me i kept going through select scenes in my head. the cinematics blew, and minus the few cheesy scenes, this is one blockbuster which i wouldnt mind watching and rewatching whenever i feel like the mood for a feel-gooder, just because it straddles the line between thoughtful and crowd-pleasing. 

i hate linzhiling/xiaoqiao and have a shameless fondness towards sunquan, zhaozilong and that japanese guy- ganxing, i think his name was.  it also felt as if xiaoyanzi was in the show so i really missed yongqi.

nothing is original

id still want to swan dive, into you

so im back in singapore; landed last morning at 08h00, after which town for a notsoquick lunch, and the muchly anticipated haircut and browsthreading, and a scary 18-hours sleep. nevermind the haircut was a disastrous and currently deterring me from going out for the next week or so): point is, I AM BACK. after 5 months of frivolously being part of a continent so thrilling i wanted to stay forever in, 39 hours ago i was finally back in my dads cab weaving through the highways of singapore.

id always thought id be fine with staying in paris forever, because it is everything id always thought it would be, maybe more, bigger, and better. i think i will still be fine with staying there forever, but just now, when i came back home everything felt really right. the bed was where it should be (super single, next to the wall with the window), the table still had that copy of july08 smitten, i could spin round and round in the livingroom if i wanted to, WITHOUT HITTING THE WALLS, and zomg is it awesome to live in an apartment with more than one bedroom !

there had been episodes of unhappiness in the last few months, from homesickness to emotional scuffles to loneliness to im-sick-of-being-cold, and there were times i wished i was back home in the familiar comfort where everything would be predictable and safe, but really in sum, on retrospect: EXCHANGE WAS AN INSANE, MIND-BLOWING EXPERIENCE. i could go on and on about how its an invaluable and absolutely indulgent experience; starting with rooming with one of the best people in the world, the liberating experience of living by yourself (almost) so you have pretty much control of everything, a nice clean break, FRENCH EVERYTHING, travelling: belgiumitalylondonbarcelonastrasbourggermanyitalylondonAGAIN(:, yux and mag, miss neuche and the dream team ! i didnt think i’ll miss december so much, i was never one for sentiments and get-togethers; going italy again wasnt what i wouldve wanted to do on my accord, and not doing london proper as a tourist will be one of my greatest regrets, but for all its worth, december worked out amazing and it definitely wrapped up exchange well. christmas at vaticancity was surprisingly amazing. right between 24dec and 25dec i was with a group of the most special people and even though i was freeeezing my stupid ass off, but there was a warmth from within which made me want to text everyone i hold dear to my heart, because somehow i felt that fuzzyfeeling was special enough to travel through texts/cells and manifest itself in those across the ocean as well. i couldnt have been any happier in the brain-blowing cold i was in. newyears was an understated affair with takeaways and champagnes and i know i never said it, even though i came close to texting everyone that night after the rest went home, but really, thank youu so much for coming over with muffinman and krispykremes all, it was so sweet it punished me for feeling emo/antisocial when its newyearseve and one of my last days in londres; we couldve been part of the stampede ! the best and worst thing of it all was that it really was quite once-in-a-lifetime, i dont think the same group of people could ever congregate in london/rome again. that makes it so precious.

i couldnt explain or capture the past few months in words even if i want to, its just so much moree, i dont think i can be more afraid of forgetting something. december08 was just the freshest batch of memories which came along with exchange, there are still so much more which had to be tucked further to make room for more happies. there was also cooking in the kitchenette, cokelight/cafecremes at bistros, paris by dusk, gourmet sexcapades .. omg so MUCH MORE, that in the next few months or even years there will be times when i will be paris-sick, or exchange-sick, but you will have to bear with me cos that will be my way of reminiscing and remembering some of the best days in my life. right now, just HAPPY2009(: 2008 had been quite a thrill (as with all other years actually), but one which i had enjoyed tremendously. 2009 will be good too; i feel it in my fingers, i feel it in my toes♥