half the world probably got this circulating mail in their inboxes alr, but i justjust got em from dearest nette (the zurnist) and these 2 made me laugh out loud.

im so scared for pre-race kit collection tmr ! theres something BOUND to screw up and i dont know what and omg im so dhfdghkljgh thinking about it. it stinks to have people clearing up the mess you leave behind and i dont want that to happeeeennn. my heart gave a dainty little somersault at, “eh so tomorrow you’re going to be the overall coordinator. can ah?”
caaaan. can is can.

oh pleaseplease let tmr go well. no screw-ups. nobody fuming at wrong information dispensed. no one turning up when theyre not supposed to. no information NOT dispensed cos i forgot (oh my God please dont let me forget anything !). fwarr. and peterparker says with great power comes great responsibility ! hahaa.
but its been fun. aside from the crushing workload, and a particularly annoying socialpysch partner, its been a great experience. when bicomm’s finally over i’ll wanna go on a overseas cip trip(:

there is something very draining about Humbert Humbert and his Humbert fantasies. it took me half a day to trudge through some 30 pages. miss ma in sec3 (now married and mrs something but i never remembered whats her husband’s family name) used to tell us that you need to meet the right book at the right time of your life in order to enjoy it. i think right, classic literary works arent tangential to my mind now. more like a totally different plane altogether. haha i managed to finish picoult in a day. this book abt the girl named Trixie who allegedly got raped. then the rapist (Jason) committed suicide. then Trixie ran off to Alaska. then the parents (Laura and Daniel) gave chase. then in the end we realised its really Laura who killed the rapist.
like that how ah. like that how to pass el2101. fwarr got scared really got scared.

anyways ha ha cos gmail failed me again, with regards to sending mass mails, i ended up creaming butter and sugar at 2330 to make nutellacupcakes. little gems which cannot go wrong in the oven and always feel right in the tummy(: ran out of ugly muffin-liners and ended up having to use those purrrrdy ones from b.i.y. so now i have jumbo nutella cupcakes in pretty strawberry-printed cupcake cups. baking is so therapeutic everyone should start baking and there will be no wars on earth but instead loadsa yummy confections. measuring spooning sifting stirring ! even cleaning the butter cream off the mixer is quite fun. i still cant decide whether or not i should bring them to the bicomm meeting tmr. i only have 10 ! thats too much for my dad and brother, and too little for the bicomm people. decisions decisions.
its so hard being si.

registration has officially, finally, ENDED. now its onto the other prep work and SOON IT WILL ALL BE OVER !!

i didnt manage to do work today. the times i was awake i was either at the phone or the comp. the times when i werent doing either i was reading picoult’s the tenth circle, lovingly borrowed from my cousin on chu er. speaking of newyears ! its been more than what i’d expected ! save for the mundane house-hopping on chu yi, its been greattt sitting around in a messy house swarming with relatives, tables piled high with good cooking, kid-cousins who used to be so small, and the midnight movie -us 4 again ! and chu san it was the rts (minus dear mrng) and mylovelys (minus our londoner !).

life is good when youve lovers aplenty<3

and i managed to get su and mel to do my uglyface. but im the ugliest doing the uglyface so i win. and photowhoring is great fun when youve a very good camera cell dont you think(: oho my life is good now. all i need is a SUONAAAA REUNION DINNER !! and KAAARE to come back fastly so we can have our mock satc lunch/es

i think it takes very little to vascillate me back and forth the emotional pendulum hahaa.

and i need bakwa ! i cant believe i havent had any ! cny leh NO BAKWA !! gnurrghgkfhgkjfhgkh. heh heh alrightt happy cny all. im going to lovingly update participants particulars now(:

my lover and i !

haha happy vday all you babes<3

its been a while. ive gotten haivis under my skin in the hot sun and biathlon participants had exceeded the Big 8(: what happiness. meanwhile id been wanting eat live and breathe french. incidentally i had been listening to “learn in your car french” and “radio oh-la-la” for the past few hours hoping the language will osmose into me while i send emails and msn nette and su and some other random people.
tmr i shall buy a baguette from deliFRANCE, if thats the closest to a boulangerie francais i can get in singapour(: and then we were talking about sep to france just now (despite discrepancies in exactly when we shall be leaving but the point is WE WILL BE LEAVING FOR FRANCEEE) and i was fantasizing flying around europe on fridays for the Friday Dinners and it shall be the 5 of us, happy european etudiants, basking european sun and breathing european air ! we love you chongs we’re constantly thinking of ways to get across the globe to get to youu<3

on a more melancholic note i think i have stopped anticipating chinesenewyear. i cant be sure if its the cynicism accompanying growing up, or The Mum, or that cny in local context had never been more of a set of stipulated dates to visit relatives you see once a year, but i cant seem to find the toes-tingling feeling anymore when cny approaches. in the spirit of symbolic interationism cny is but a couple of days people attach significant meaning to. i remember when i knew clearly what cny meant -when cny clothes shopping was quite a big deal (even though i end up wearing quite the same stuff every year), and breathing the fresh crisp notes when the parents pack angbaos made me excited. come to think of it it had been 3 years since i had a so to say normal newyear. 2005 there was the uninvited Fire on the 2nd day, and 2006 we were in mourning. 2007 there is a strangeness, cos it doesnt seem right to be festive so soon, yet we lack the official excuse of mourning to avoid cny. during the 7-days wake i remember thinking everything will be harder when we fall back into everyday routine and find the void she had left behind, and now i think its hardest when i have to consciously acknowledge her absence. during socioffood tutorial the tutor asked whose dad cooks at home (a la gendered division of labour in the kitchen) and my hand went up after a little hesitation. when she went around the room asking the reason (all went along the line of “my mums a bad cook” and “he just loves cooking”) i realised i wouldnt be able to verbalize the reason. i froze for a split second imagining having to address the very thing i had pushed to the back of my head to a group of almost-strangers and slunk into my seat. fortunately she must have not seen my hand cos she didnt ask me in the end.

well im still a-okay. quite happy thinking abt the impending midtermbreak, when im determined to clear all my readings. itll also mean bi07 will be comingcomingcominggg* and i cant wait for that either cos its high time it stops bogging down my timetable. i’d been making new friends from the bicomm. i wonder if i’ll be attached enough to feel a little sad when it all ends. right now i dont think so. afterall registration is quite an antisocial act and i settle stuffs alone. what a shame. i started out a year1 filled with with glorious prospects abt making new friends through such an event.

there is nothing vaguely resembling a rose, in colour or otherwise, today. there’re days when one thing slips and everything else do too and this is one of Those Days.

i do not really know where that last straw will come that will break the camels back. i came home from french, as usual tres fatiguee from all the verbes irregular and noms and whathaveyous. quick dinner, then i dropped dead on my dads bed around 10, partly out of pissed-ness cos the connection died on me again (and my dad thinks its funny i accused him of disrupting it by coming into the room. HE DOES NOT UNDERSTAND.) and finally woken up up his thunder snores. i went back to my room and slept till 3. and get this -i consciously woke up at 3 to answer mails (actually it was to do socialpsych, but i got sidetracked and anyways that was a good dramatic punctuation.
hunbert humbert.)
and mails i answered, after a good cup of greentea and my honey/cinnamon mix. it doesnt help that all the unread smses on my cell pressed me for a deadline, of which the most glaring include:
“hey si when are we calling the past participants ?” -the ocomm secretary (allow me to whine here that there’re 1000+ past participants we have to cajole into joining this years bi and im not dying to delve into that but reg is closing 11feb)
” siii are we going cny shopping?” -mag (i want to !! but when the hell ):)
” hey have you sent me your part of the report?” -my socialpsych partner (i havent done the cursed report. im too ashamed to reply.)
i feel like skipping tomorrow to settle everything but i cant do thatt. ive tuition tmr night. i was contemplating cancelling but then i remembered this sat ive to cancel all 3 tuitions cos of the swim test (and shite i was supposed to collect my moolah !! ALL 320 !! im beyond peeved.). in a bid to regain some control of my life id given up on my driving practicals. close to 600 lies now in my bbdc account, frozen assets for when si wants to drive again.
un-ironed clothes lie in a heap on my bed. i move them to my chair when im going to sleep. off the chair and off the bed and off the chair again -i havent the time to iron them.
ive un-cashed cheques from regentsec. ive people to meet at the src during the course of the week to do manual registration -the times are staggered and im personally quite worried i’ll forget one of the appointments and end up losing a angry potential participant whom i may have to placate with emails and that’ll take sometime.
whinewhinewhine. i should try getting some stuff done instead of immortalizing my pules. sheesh.

my head swells when i think of all the work i havent cleared.
/ another 200ish mighty pages of humbert humbert and his lola
/ socialpsych/ socioffood readings, multiplied to infinitum
/ socialpsych writeup ! supposed to be done by today by it still isnt and i havent the mood to read up and do it
/ francais francais!! je ne comprend pas !
/ polscience is one immense headache by itself, complete with a non-existent prc tutor
/ to call sec schools and past participants. geez.
i need more time and maybe more si’s.

im used to sleeping with an empty acidic stomach. acidic cos of the greentea. empty cos i hero-worship oprah (who ironically isnt really skinny by any standard so whos she to dispense dietary advice sheesh). my brother shoved 4 nuggets under my nose just now, the stale pre-packed chicken smell invading my little haven in front of the comp. i refused, inflated with willpower. hahaa but when i changed my mind and went out to casually/hopefully pick up one nugget he’d finished alllll of them. ass.

i figured it was time to move. i got sick of my template, yet i think id exhausted every single pretty template on the face of earth. and sixteenroses.blogspot doesnt sound as nice as it did when i was in sec3.

honestly, i cant figure out what id been doing since school started. LOOK ITS 0322 NOW and im blogging. previously i tried continuing lolita (funny, but boring) and was updating the database and replying emails and composing emails and doing all those yawn stuff. the post-its on my desktop are embarassing (“SETTLE REGISTRATION TASKS !” “send emails to swim test people,” “david pohly/ tay weemeng/ lum chee meng : 1.50 each !” “debbie ho min – verify with indemnity form,” “call ivp,” “call sec schools” ..)
i can understand why nette wants to go dubai. if ive the chance i’ll go dubai too. anywhere. a change in environment and a change in people (nothing wrong with those around, but itll be good to meet different ones) sound infinitely promising now. im keeping my eyes peeled for a good overseas cip trip now -and im going to work my ass off (hopefully ! but from the looks of things .!) for sep. oGod i really hope sep comes true.

i suspect tuition has alot to do with my Saturday Whining Fits. maybe the night air too. i dont knowww. im miserable right now. i want outttt.